Monday, October 11, 2004

Saratoga Spring? He forgot Poland again! 

Mitch has this uproarious bit from Kerry's asking for his water in the NYT magazine interview (in which everyone is on him for the terrorism-as-law-enforcement comment).

A row of Evian water bottles had been thoughtfully placed on a nearby table. Kerry frowned.

''Can we get any of my water?'' he asked Stephanie Cutter, his communications director, who dutifully scurried from the room. I asked Kerry, out of sheer curiosity, what he didn't like about Evian.

''I hate that stuff,'' Kerry explained to me. ''They pack it full of minerals.''

''What kind of water do you drink?'' I asked, trying to make conversation.

''Plain old American water,'' he said.

''You mean tap water?''

''No,'' Kerry replied deliberately. He seemed now to sense some kind of trap. I was left to imagine what was going through his head. If I admit that I drink bottled water, then he might say I'm out of touch with ordinary voters. But doesn't demanding my own brand of water seem even more aristocratic? Then again, Evian is French -- important to stay away from anything even remotely French.

''There are all kinds of waters,'' he said finally. Pause. ''Saratoga Spring.'' This seemed to have exhausted his list. ''Sometimes I drink tap water,'' he added.

Saratoga Spring Water comes in an upscale blue bottle as well as a common plastic bottle (if you care about these things.) What surprises me is that nobody from Boston or New Hampshire (my birthplace) that I know drinks the stuff. I thought what he would say is Poland Spring, a local company up in Maine that advertises and sells heavily into the New England market and has for many years. You don't pick a New York product when a Maine product is at hand. Besides, isn't Kerry already winning New York?