Somebody alert our friends in Winona. There is a new hero in the battle to blunt the wave of V-Day celebrations, according to Christina Hoff Sommers. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Testaclese. Sauce for the goose, alas, is not sauce for the gander, as Erin O'Connor reports.

As student feminist groups papered the campus with flyers declaring such sentiments as "My Vagina is Flirty" and "My Vagina is Huggable," sold vagina-shaped lollipops, and organized an "orgasm workshop," the College Republicans staged a competing celebration of the penis. Penis Day, or "P-Day," featured a performance of The Penis Monologues; flyers declaring that "My penis is majestic," "My penis is hilarious," and "My penis is studious"; and a costumed phallic-shaped mascot named Testaclese. P-Day did not go over well at Roger Williams--two students involved in staging The Penis Monologues have been places on probation, and the Testaclese costume was confiscated after Testaclese approached a provost in the student union and congratulated him for being a "Penis Warrior." A Free Testaclese Fund is now in the works.

The pictures of the awarding of Provost Kavanaugh are frankly hilarious; he apparently thought at first it was Mushroom Day, says Sommers. The resulting probation of course has created the perfect press opportunity for Roger Williams' College Republicans to show again the double standards that exist on our campuses. As Sommers concludes, you can expect to find more P-Day parodies on campuses around America next year. Given the choice between that and a bake sale...